
Thursday, December 20, 2007
Zimbabwe Ruined

Monday, December 17, 2007
STOP THE PRESS!!!

Check out this article which was on the front page of the BBC news website yesterday!!
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/7146551.stm
The article reports that:
A swimmer has been attacked by a shark at Australia's Bondi Beach, a favourite with tourists from around the world. The shark reportedly grabbed the man by the arm but he escaped after punching it on the nose.
Its common knowledge among Australians and tourists alike that punching a shark on the nose is the conventional defence if attacked. Less conventional is what the guy did next...
The man reached the Sydney shore before collapsing in a cave in which he was said to be living temporarily. He was later found by his girlfriend.
Eh??? The guy is 'living in a cave'...? What's that all about? This immediately suggests to me that there's something fishy (so to speak) about this. And sure enough...
A lifeguard spokesman said the man had gone swimming in the dark on Friday, which was strongly discouraged.
Channel Ten reported it was believed to be the first shark attack at Bondi Beach for 70 years.
So there we go, not much to worry about for another 70 years. And only then if you're crazy enough to go swimming in the dark. Though probably as well that I didn't know about this incident when I went into the exact same waters less than twelve hours later!!!!!!!!!!!
Finally, I also have to point out that he was later found by his 'girlfriend'. Isn't Sydney an awesome place when even a guy who lives in a cave can get a girlfriend...

A cave, yesterday.
Saturday, December 08, 2007
Big Swim in the Big Surf
Last Friday some of my work colleagues were kind enough to take me out for drinks to welcome me back to Opportunity. We had a great night in Cruise Bar in Circular Quay, overlooking the opera house across the inner-harbour waters of Sydney cove. At the back of my mind though, I had a nagging suspicion that each additional beer would be regretted the next morning...
And so it proved when I dragged myself out of bed and headed down to Bondi beach for the first of three ocean swimming lessons. This short course is intended to teach you techniques for swimming in surf, which will in turn give you the confidence to compete in Sydney's ocean swimming races which are spread throughout the Australian summer.
There were four of us on the course, including myself and my German friend Babette. We were thrown (not literally) straight into the water by Mel, our very aussie coach, and told to swim 200m out into the Bondi surf. This was pretty 'exciting', not least because my hangover was playing havoc with my swimming stroke. After struggling back to shore Mel pointed out things we were doing wrong (drowning/sinking were only the least of them) before throwing us (literally this time) back in the water again.
Mel is a great coach, and like many great aussie sportsmen, unfailingly enthusiastic. He taught us skills for spotting where the rip current is pulling the water out to sea - good place to swim out - and where the waves are crashing over the sandbanks - good place to swim in... if you can avoid/survive being bundled by a monster wave.
Other techniques include using your arms as a board to 'surf in' on the top of large waves, entering the water with jumping, wading and porpoising techniques (which impresses people watching on the beach!) and breathing in such a way as to be able to look behind you and spot when you're about to be hammered by a huge wave.
This was all great advice and really interesting stuff, though I was a bit bemused when he got us to run along the beach and back to keep warm - ok, it was cloudy and the aussie guys were shivering but I was more likely to collapse from exhaustion than catch cold.
After the hour and a half long session had finished I felt absolutely on top of the world. This is surf swimming at one of the best locations in the world, with some of the wildest surf! The regular swim club joined us for the last hour and it was a great feeling 'competing' with these guys and girls. On top of which, to feel so pumped at 1130 on Saturday morning is something I'm not used to. and very welcome!
I'm really going to stick with this and join the regular club when my courses finish. My hope is to do the Bondi classic competition on the 6th of January. A bit ambitious, but I'll see how I'm going over the next few weeks, and it would be a good one to start with as you don't have to swim past rocks/cliffs as you do in the beach to beach swims.

CHRISTMAS DISORDERS and CAROLS
1. Schizophrenia --- Do You Hear What I Hear?
2. Multiple Personality Disorder --- We Three Kings Disoriented Are
3. Dementia --- I Think I'll be Home for Christmas
4. Narcissistic --- Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me
5. Manic --- Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Treesand.....
6. Paranoid --- Santa Claus is Coming to Town to Get Me
7. Borderline Personality Disorder --- Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire
8. Personality Disorder --- You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm GonnaPout, Maybe I'll Tell You Why
9. Attention Deficit Disorder --- Silent night, Holy oooh look at the Froggy- can I have a chocolate, why is France so far away?
10. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder --- Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, JingleBells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,Jingle,Bells, Jingle Bells,
11. Oppositional Defiant Disorder-- You better not cry - Oh yes I willYou better not Shout - I can if I want to You better not pout - Can if I want toI'm telling you why - Not listeningSanta Claus is coming to townNo he's not!!
Wednesday, December 05, 2007
Over the Hill and Under the Waves

As I start a second week at work I recall that, one of the things that attracted me to living and working in Sydney, was the atmosphere in the CBD (Central Business District). There’s a liveliness in the city-centre at all times of the day and night. Back near the start of the year I mentioned on this website how I thought that this great atmosphere was in part due to how young the general population appeared when you wandered around the city at lunchtime.
And now statistics have been published which back this up.
The Sydney Morning Herald this week included an article on plans to make the city-centre more accessible to children and old people. Surveys were done, which showed that these groups were very poorly represented in the city centre:
“In a survey of people and activities taken on a summer weekday at Circular Quay, Pitt Street Mall and George Street, 57 per cent of people in the city were found to be aged from 15 to 30…
The middle-aged made up 37 per cent, and the elderly and the very young both registered slim minorities at 3 per cent each.”
Now, I take two things from this. Firstly, almost 3 in 5 people are between 15 and 30. No wonder Sydney’s business district has such a young and lively feel to it.
Secondly, who the hell are they calling middle-aged???
Alive on the Ocean Waves
Last weekend I found myself with a few spare hours and decided to head down to the Eastern Beaches. This would be the first time I'd been back there since getting back to Sydney. The main stretch of beaches runs from Bondi in the north, down to Coogee in the south. A little further south from there, is Maroubra beach, and having seen it featured in the national newspaper in the past week I thought I'd pay a visit.
A favourite topic of conversation in the Eastern Beaches, aside from surfer fashi

Swimmers were evacuated from beaches in southern Sydney and on the South Coast yesterday after 17 sightings of sharks close to shore. A lone hammerhead was observed off Wanda Beach at Cronulla. An Australian Aerial Patrol crew sounded the alert and a dinghy was dispatched to coax the shark into deeper water. Meanwhile, two large sharks seen at Cudmirrah Beach near Sussex Inlet on the South Coast were thought to have been either white pointer [aka great white] or tiger sharks, authorities said.
So it was with some interest that I made my way down to Maroubra beach. I wasn't surprised to find aussies and tourists getting on with it, with a large number of people in the surf. I had a pretty uneventful swim myself. However, about half-an-hour later the shark-patrol were out with a dinghy out in the water and a chopper making a few passes overhead. Not sure if they'd spotted anything but either way, it wasn't discouraging people from getting in the water. That's the aussie spirit!
Which brings me nicely on to my latest hobby - ocean swimming. Ocean swimming has become increasingly popular in Australia over the last few years (though this doesn't appear to have dampened enthusiasm at Sydney Council for building yet more Olympic sized swimming pools - Surry Hills is the latest area cited for a new pool). This popularity will only be stoked by the recent announcement that a 10km open swim will be an event in Beijing for the first time in Olympic history.

Bondi fitclub runs Saturday morning courses for people to learn to swim with confidence in the sea. This Saturday is the first day of the course and I'm very much looking forward to it. Lets hope the shark patrol are on top form!
Wine-ing Pommes
The Hunter Valley got a brief mention on this website when I went up there for the Lovedale long lunch in May. Being a truly beautiful stretch of countryside, with rolling vineyards and hills, I was keen to go back asap. On Saturday I went back up on a day-trip, which - somewhat bizarrely - started with liquers and then moved on to three different authentic Aussie wineries.

Though the trip was well organised and the winery visits were interesting, I didn't go a whole bundle on the wines. They were not bad, but I don't think we were sampling at the higher-end of the wine range. Fair enough - I don't usually shop at the finer end of the wine range, but when on a wine tour I do like to sample some of the more luxury wines. There were a couple of cheeky reds that I liked though, so I took the opportunity to stock-up a bit for Christmas.
So I wasn't actually that impressed with the wine on the day. And I'm not the only one with reservations about Australian wine. The Sunday Herald reported at the weekend that the head of Tesco's wine-buying division - Dan Jago - has criticised Australian wine-makers for their lack of innovation, warning that Tesco will be forced towards fast-changing and refreshing Chilean wines.
I just love the response of "Hunter Valley winemaker" Bruce (yep, Bruce) Tyrrell:
"He's a wanker."
Bruce goes on to fulminate thoughtfully on Mr Jago's challenge to the Australian wine industry:
"He should go back to selling dog food.
For years the Australian wine industry has been supplying the British with technically correct wines that have good colour and are full of flavour, compared with the Europeans, who have been supplying them with technically poor wines with no colour and taste like cat's piss"

Tuesday, December 04, 2007
(Politically speaking) Things Can Only Get Better


http://www.guardian.co.uk/australia/story/0,,2217015,00.html
